
It is with great inspiration and eagerness that I come to you today. In the past hour, I have constructed what I consider to be a beautiful monstrosity that must be shared with the world. That monstrosity, in all its glory and elegance, is known by a better name: chocolate.
In the past, I had previously discovered a recipe for self-crafted chocolate that satisfied me; but alas, this was during the time when that foul villain coconut oil was considered an angelic substance. When the secret of the oil’s 90% saturated fat content was released, the masses, in their innocent nievity, neglected this information; I among them. But with new-found maturity, have sought for a replacement fat that would aid my body, and today that search had ended. Avocados have been gifted to me, to which I show no reluctance.
So the avocado, dressed in its dark rode, made its presence known to me, for which I embrassed it with open palm. Its green flesh overpowered the vein-clogging properties of the coconut oil, and so made its way into the heavenly mix that is chocolate. Here are the components:
- One whole avocado
- Half a cup of cocoa powder
- a capful of vanilla
- 4 tablespoons of honey (or more to your preference)
Call, by the mighty power of your lungs, the ingredients to you; draw them close, and let them know of your steadfastness. Then, in a fiery burst of betrayal, throw them all into the iron jaws of a food processor. The avocado should be the first to go for its thick body takes longest to be murdered into a fine pulp. Throw the rest in as a family, and spare no pity for your edible companions, as they were foolish enough to trust you. You may desolve the mixture currently in the hell that is your stomach, or you may store it in the machanical tundra for an hour to complete the solidifying process.
And that is how one makes chocolate, not from the meadows of your kindness, but through unhinged destruction. For chocolate is not for the faint of heart; if it is true that man is what man consumes, then I am dark and bitter, but with a hint of sweetness, for my small stature and chubby cheeks shall betray me to such an impression. But, dearest brothers and sisters, do not fear the darkness, for is will make you strong. The deep of the cocoa powder will fortify your heart for the trials and tribulations. For truely I say to you, the day shall come when the pillars of the earth crumble beneath your feet and death shall be your lover, but you shall mirthfully laugh, riding on the wings of heart health gifted to by your decadent creation. No longer shall your tears lie on the shoulders of friends. No longer shall the musings of young lads crumble your mind. You, being rooted and grounded in chocolate, shall be immortalized in all the ways of the spirit, for your heart shall be strong.
I recomend snacking on chocolate in between meals to boost your metabolism. It is also made vegan, for your health.

Before we start, I’d like to introduce myself. I’m a junior in high school who works her butt off to get straight A’s. Outside of school, I’m a cashier, a sister, a daughter, a friend, and the best pet mom ever. Call me biased, but I think I’m one of the most hilarious people on this planet and you’re definitely missing out if we’re not friends. Overall, I have a great life that I don’t want to trade for anything.

By now, after years of scrolling through your instagram feeds every hour of every day, you have come to realize that it all has become so addictive, especially those ‘likes’ you are getting on the artsy photo that you just posted. So what is social media doing to my brain? Why am I so addicted to the ‘likes’ and what are they doing to my self-esteem?
Everyone has a purpose in life; it’s just a fact. The challenging aspect of purposes is not accepting them, it is determining what they are and what they mean. Ask any person what it means to have a purpose, and they will most likely stare back at you with a blank look on their face. Ask any person what their purpose in life is, and the most common response will be “I don’t know.” But in reality, “what is the purpose of life” is a flawed question; no one has one single purpose in life, we have a new purpose every day that just needs to be discovered.