Being as the Ap tests are only weeks away and every Ap student is simply terrified, I thought there is no better way to express such a fear then in the form of a blog post. As the days slowly creep away I feel as though my best bet at getting through such a hurtle in my life is to simply not go. I’m tempted to “come down with something” on the day of, to avoid the confrontation all together. Im fearful I will walk in and my pencil will be out of lead. I’m fearful my brain will simply decided to stop working within the first five minutes of the exam. However, most importantly I’m fearful of the fear. I feel as though by such a point in my junior year I should feel prepared enough to take the Ap test, and yet I don’t. Of course I know not to use the words it, this, and you on my paper because the writing will appear to be lazy. Of course I now know how to implement words such as syntax, diction, and pacing into my writing. Of course I know each body paragraph of a well written essay must start with an argument, so well written, the reader will immediately think of the claim from the one sentence. Of course I know all of these things, but doesn’t every other student there? How do I be different, how do I stand out enough to get a 4 instead of a 3? I want the 97 dollars I put down, to take such an awful test, to be worth every penny. I want to feel confident going into testing day, I want to feel smart, as if I can do anything. I want to do good, but the fear inside of me, twisted up within my veins and rooted at my heart, is making such a task nearly impossible.
Eve Holbrook


Emma Gosselin
